To the Boy who broke my Heart

I'm not a gay nor any kind of homosexual, I just want to express what am I feeling to the boy who broke my heart. 

To the boy who broke my heart, I just want to say two things. I hate you and Thank you. 

Thank you for the times that you were here, with us and with me, whenever I'm needing you. 

Thank you for the experience and lessons that I've learned from you. 

Thank you for the days that you were here to provide everything to me and to us. 

Thank you for acknowledging me as your own.

But still hating you at the same time. 

I hate you for leaving us behind. 

I hate you for making my mama's cry. 

I hate you for making lolo, lola, uncles and aunts suffered. 

I hate you for making my mama sold everything we have. 

I hate you.

To the boy who broke my heart.

Thank you for leaving.

We'd learned how to stand in our own. 

We learned how to fight back. 

We learned how to provide what we are needing. 

We learned that not everything we want is everything we might have. 

We learned how to manage the pain. 

Well, maybe I missed the chance that you will taught us how to play basketball (although I'm not a fan of that sport, Soccer is life)

The chance that we will eat together outside the town. 

The chance that we will celebrate my birthdays and my siblings' birthday. 

The chance that we will face the morning of Christmases and New years. 

The chance that we are complete. 

Thank you. 

If you didn't leave us.

We might not be the person as we are now. 

I wrote this because it's your birthday last January 16 wherein you have the same birthday with Mama. 

To the boy...

Just Boy. 

Because You're not a man. 

You are not a man for leaving us. 

You are not a man for not providing everything to us. 

You are not a man for not being with us when we graduated elementary. 

You are not a man for not being with Mama when she gave birth to Jonjon. 

You are not a man for making us carrying the burdens. 

You are not a man for not facing the consequences of your decisions. 

I know you will not be able to read this but I want you to know there's a man who fixed the brokenness of heart. 

There's a man who replaced your role by mentoring us. 

There's a man who taught me how to forgive. 

There's a man who filled the vessel in me. 

There's a man who died for me and save me from my wrong deeds.

He's a man of words. 

Wherein I can't repay what He did to me. 

I love you, Papa for taking me into this World. 

But I'm more loving Jesus-Christ for changing me into new one. 

For dying for me. 

For saving me. 

For everything. 

And I'm more willing to give my life to Him.